It’s all in day’s work

6:30 am, wake up, curse the effin’ mobile which sings happily “Dil kabhi ganda, kabhi hai nek banda”, fall out of bed, walk into the bathroom door, groan, walk into various fixtures cursing a blue streak and then open eyes, look at my own reflection, (OMG I look like a hag) groan, close eyes, wash face and then feeling kind of awake, open bed room door, stumble over sleeping dogs, walk into kitchen, start breakfast and lunch, open door to let the dogs out, wake up live in servant …….. Good Morning NCR   

7 am, live in help takes over kitchen and I go back into the room, start doing various exercises (I hate them but I have to) while watching music channels to divert my mind from the pain of exercising … while training my ear to the going ons in the house … ahh DIL is up, good, dammit Kid#2 will get late for college, dammit Ramu should be doing the rotis by now.  I have found that if I get annoyed or tense, I exercise more vigorously – so I suspect I work myself up – so that the damn kicks reach higher and the damn moves are faster.  I work myself into a fine sweat and then feel happier with life.  Yayyy the pheromones are kicking in …..

8 am, the kids are out of the house and its time to go get shopping list ready and take a tour of the house with Ramu while giving him some instructions and then rush back into my room to get ready for office.

TRRRRRING TRRRRRING

Me : Hello beta

DIL: Mom, you’re at home

Me: Yes beta

DIL: Mom can you please check – I think I left my diamond ring in the loo

Me : Sigh : Yes beta, am going upstairs to your loo.  I’ll keep it in my bag.  Take it from me in the night.

DIL : I’ll check up with you.  Byeee

Uff, now where was I? Oh yes, getting ready for breakfast and office.  DIL’s ring is now in my bag and I am back in the morning madness.  I’m wearing my clothes when another call comes

TRRRING TRRING

Me: Hello

Kid#2: Mom do you have my passport photo

Me: Yeah

Kid#2 : Mom I forgot to take it with me in the morning, can you drop one on your way to office

Me : I work in mnbbv which is North, your college is in lkjhg which is south – I cant

Kid#2 : Moooooooooooooooooooooooooommmmmmmmmmmmmm

Me : You got a car – just go to the market and get one taken.  Takes 15 minutes

Kid#2 : Sigh

Me : Heavy Sigh!!!!!

Have breakfast and escape to work.  On the road

TRRRING TRRING

Me : Hello

Ex : Ritu how are you

Me : Good

Uncomfortable silence for one whole minute

Ex : I guess you are wondering why I called you

Me : Yeah ………….

Ex : Kid#1 is not answering my mails or returning my calls

Me : Okay, I’ll tell him to (mentally thinking you goddamn idiot, he’s an adult, you patronise and boss him, obviously he doesnt wanna talk to you)

Ex : Okay I’ll ring you back for a reply

Me : Do it late in the night (or dont) okay

Ex : Sigh!!!

Me : Heavier Sigh!!!!!!

12 noon while busy doing up some drafting of reports

TRRRING TRRING

Me : Hello

Voice : Good afternoon Madam, I am calling from Vodaphone

Me : Snarling : I dont want your product or whatever bullshit scheme you are selling

Sigh! Poor guys. Telemarketing is a terrible business. But while juggling cooking, housekeeping, being a detective, the lost and found deptt., errand runner, advisor, relationship mediator and bread earner, I simply have no time or desire to be patient with them.