The Great Escape

Any one remember the lovely Snowhite?

The babe who kept house for seven dwarves

Named Happy, Sneezy, Dopey and Doc

Grumpy, Bashful, Sleepy – the names rock

 

But before getting kissed 

By her prince on the lips

She had to eat the poisoned apple

Dont ask, I did not write the fable

 

I too met the seven dwarves

Only these came with menopause

Itchy, bitchy, bloated and sweaty

Psycho, forgetful and sleepy

Ah well, I guess I got a lucky break.  The doctor decided that it was time for organ donation because of various complications I was having.  Like every thing else in my life, this shocker came without any mental preparation.  I was supposed to go for Bhai Dooj to a cousin’s home.  He rang up and said lets all get together for dinner.  I had time to spare, so decided to go for a check up, since I was having problems.  I landed up at the hospital, with gifts, mithai and pooja thali for my bhai dooj neatly packed in the back seat of my car.  Talk about not being in the mood .

The gynae was waiting for me, it seemed.  She was like – Rani, kithey jaa rahi hai, hunh bai jaa (translation – Lady where are you off to, now sit down).  So I rang up the kids, who packed up an overnighter for me and landed up at the hospital.

The very next day I had a surgery and have come home sans uterus and ovaries, and stitches on the stomach.

You know what the crazy thing is?

Now I feel happy.  I met the 7 nasty menopausal dwarves – lived with them for a year, and along with the organ donation, I think I left them at the hospital.  I feel more balanced, cheerful and calm.  

Guess what?  I had the classic great escape.  I side-stepped meano-pause

I too met the seven dwarves

Only these came with menopause

Itchy, bitchy, bloated and sweaty

Psycho, forgetful and sleepy

Now you guys can kiss my ass

Mood swings, I’ll give you a pass

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22 thoughts on “The Great Escape

  1. Oye teri di,
    You left a comment on my blog that u are on bed rest and i was like, nooooo this woman cannot be on bed rest, bed nu rest kara daungi eh taaa…
    and here i come and find you donating your organs…
    But i m glad you took this decision if it was necessary for you because most of the women skirt this issue. Take good post operative care of yourself. Get yourself pampered by DIL. I remember the problems my mom law had with hysterectomy…
    Love you,
    with loads of hugs

    Funny thing is I am feeling good, happy and young. My skin glows like I’ve had a facial. Its wierd – I hope this feel good thing continues and I dont have complications

  2. So, now what we have with us is a slightly “Hollow Woman”…:)
    Jokes apart…..you were missed.

    Wish you full recovery soon.

    LOL I like this – The Hollow Woman. As it is I am giving the kids a bad time with my THE MOMMY RETURNS and walking around like a mummy when they want me to go to sleep. I’ll add this to my act thanks

  3. Whoa! Take plenty of rest. Enjoy being an ‘invalid’! Manpreet is right. Get pampered, spoilt rotten. Abhi time hai.

    And after you’ve done that, jump on the bed! 🙂

    Good going. Here’s to a pampered recovery!
    Cheers!

    Thank you – tho apart fm the stitches I feel so gud that I feel I am cheating the poor kids

  4. Operation organ donation did you good .. 😀
    put up a pic darling
    congratulations on giving the menopausal phase a miss
    have fun.. stay pampered and of course we all will drink to your health and the new found glow ..

    the tip of your nose is red 😀 .
    hugs …

    I did not get a drink tho …. sigh! Any how I will make up for lost time soon

  5. Hi came here thru Mampi’s blog and found you really a lioness heart…to talk about things that women will either skirt or fret over or both…in such a nice entertaining manner…takes …well guess takes a lot of talent and a heart in the right place.

    hope you have recovered well now…and the glow continues. 🙂

    Still stitched up Priyanka – still stitched up – but it takes more than a few stitches to keep me down heh! Yeah I hope the glow continues

  6. Oh- I was wondering at the silence- saaddi Ritu chup thodey hi hondi hai! All the best for a speedy recovery, and happy healthy life minus now obsolete spare parts!

    Yeah, now I can elope with an unsuitable man and not worry about pregnancy LOL

  7. You are incorrigible! Love the spirit!

    Also wishing you a speedy recovery to full (physical) form soon. (Mind is running superbly as usual, we can see.) 😀

    Thank you Devaki

  8. Incorrigible is right! Big YO for cheating the M-Monster :D. Enjoy the glow, and do blackmail the kids to pamper you because you’re an “invalid” and have every right to feel like not doing exactly those things you’ve always hated but are capable of doing 😛
    And.. umm.. wishing you a speedy recovery, and hoping the kids can cope with your energy levels after that! 🙂

    Yeah LOL, now my duties will be choice based – not need based hehehhehe

  9. Whoa!! Great Escape from Meano-pause?? Ritu that’s why you weren’t around! How are you now?? Enjoyed reading your take on the ‘organ donation’! 😀 Hehe…

    Still stitched up – but at home thank goodness. I hate hospitals – how I hate them LOLOLOL, Hush my love, I feel a blog coming up

  10. You are an inspirations 🙂 I also had an appointment with the Gynaec yesterday, and have to go through some tests. Out of the blue. Endrometrial biopsy on 6th. Guess I can take a tip from you …. get well soon 🙂

    Do let us know how it transpires. Will pray for you. Ace the tests darling, Pappu can fail, but we Bablis will pass

  11. And I read somewhere, Menopause is Me No Pause.

    Oh absolutely. Just got rid of unnecessary baggage. My brothers have started calling us women (their wives and me the Hyster Sisters. Man, am I going to give it back to them or what hehehehehe

  12. u are certainly an inspiration u take everything so positively… take good care of urself….

    Yeah, am gonna call a beautician home, get a pedicure, manicure and facial done and watch all the movies – even Golmaal Returns heh

  13. oh great… atleast u r not complaining being a less of woman the women generally do after such act of smattering out…
    n hey have a v quick recovery.. 🙂

    P.S. i tell u one thing this thing brings some extra pounds too as side effects… hope u’ll take care of that…

    I know, I’ll have to be v v careful sigh!!!

  14. Rite I salute your spirit and attitude…..I am going through peri menopause and believe me all the seven dwarfs are dancing around me. I resemble the psycho today.

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