Monday dawned bright … and in my view, insanely early
I stumbled into the kitchen, quickly chopped and threw some veggies, rice, masalas etc into a pan for a casserole and set some ready to eat chicken tikkas to thaw for Kid #2
Was gearing up for dusting and leaving for office when maid’s husband came with the news that she broke her leg
For one insane moment I nearly waylaid him to do my jharu poncha! Nah! Even I am not that insane, but I admit, I was soooo tempted.
I looked at the dogs and nearly wrung Kid#1’s neck (in absentia) for adopting T H R E E of them. Big effin deal one or three, its all the same. We are stuck! Fed the fishes, washed the terrace, and the outer verandah’s while it was still cool.
Then I fixed some sandwiches for Kid#2 to take to college
Boss aka Mogambo rings up
Mogambo : You are on leave?!
Me : (looking at the poncha and my wet dirty pajamas, and wondering why folks have to state the obvious) Haanji
Me: Ji, I have no help at home. So I am cashing my earned leave
Mogambo: This is not done
Me: (considering that I have SIX whole months of E.L. un-encashed) I know boss, but I cant help it.
Mogambo: (Jadhoing bossgiri) Madam, when you join duty we must have a meeting about this!
Me (mentally taking deep breaths and reminding self that there is an economic slump, so I should not shove the cellphone even in imagination into certain regions) Jee Sir
He slammed the phone down and I attacked the floor with renewed ferocity
Here I admit I got carried away. I was totally angrily enthusiastic and cleaned the whole darn place. Kid#2 came back from college and faced a sweaty scruffy Mom scrubbing away to glory, and a squeaky clean home.
Mom you are insane
Me : Yeah? Tell me something new
Kid#2 : What did you tell office
Me: That I cant come because the dogs have no one at home
Kid#2 OMG!! You did not!!!
He shook his head and walked into his room looking at the watch and muttering, “She had a surgery and is still weak. I wish Bhai was here”
I walked into the bath muttering “Bhai is in Bahrain and we have a house and fishes and dogs. The house can go stew, but dammit, the dogs need care”
I came out and he thrust a vodka (large, extremely large, neat on the rocks) into my hands and I gulped it down
He thrust a plateful of casserole into my hands, I ate and crashed. Swear I did and I surfaced at 8 p.m. with Kid#2 checking if I was still breathing. Yup he was poking a finger up my nose!
I got up, did dishes, cooked dinner, did (groan) dishes, cleaned kitchen and slept.
THIS WOULD NOT DO!!!!
I had to do JUGAAD
So Tuesday found me up at 6 am on the stairs desperately looking at any ‘kaamwali” looking female. Yesss I was on the prowl. This tigress had had enough in one damn day. I accosted every likely candidate and finally got one woman to clean up for me. She even (here I thank heavens!) DUSTED!!!! It was an effin relief. But I missed my office and its a/c and the fact that I would not have to move my tired butt.
I remembered one likely candidate …………
Someone who worked as a peon in some forgotten corner of the office
I pulled strings and got him to agree to baby sit the dogs for me.
Here I unashamedly admit I called in the favors I had done for him when he nearly lost his baby to kaala khansi. In brief, I paid, and his baby lived. Poor chap, even though he is scared of dogs, he agreed.
And Wednesday I went to work!!!!
But Wednesday is another story …..
Tune in for the update
Same place …. Same saga …… Another day
I still havent got a live in