My New Mantra "I Love My Job"

I LOVE MY JOB

This is even funnier when you realize it’s real! Next time you have a bad day at work think of this guy.

Rob is a commercial saturation diver for Global Divers in Louisiana . He performs underwater repairs on offshore drilling rigs. Below is an E-mail he sent to his sister.

She then sent it to radio station 103.2 on FM dial in Ft. Wayne , Indiana , who was sponsoring a worst job experience contest.

Needless to say, she won.

Hi Sue,

Just another note from your bottom-dwelling brother.

Last week I had a bad day at the office. I know you’ve been feeling down lately at work, so I thought I would share my dilemma with you to make you realize it’s not so bad after all.

Before I can tell you what happened to me, I first must bore you with a few technicalities of my job.

As you know, my office lies at the bottom of the sea. I wear a suit to the office. It’s a wet suit. This time of year the water is quite cool. So what we do to keep warm is this: We have a diesel powered industrial water heater. This $20,000 piece of equipment sucks the water out of the sea. It heats it to a delightful temperature.

It then pumps it down to the diver through a garden hose, which is taped to the air hose. Now this sounds like a darn good plan, and I’ve used it several times with no complaints. What I do, when I get to the bottom and start working, is take the hose and stuff it down the back of my wet suit. This floods my whole suit with warm water. It’s like working in a Jacuzzi.

Everything was going well until all of a sudden, my butt started to itch. So, of course, I scratched it. This only made things worse. Within a few seconds my butt started to burn. I pulled the hose out from my back, but the damage was done.

In agony I realized what had happened. The hot water machine had sucked up a jellyfish and pumped it into my suit. Now, since I don’t have any hair on my back, the jellyfish couldn’t stick to it.

However, the crack of my butt was not as fortunate. When I scratched what I thought was an itch, I was actually grinding the jellyfish into the crack of my butt.

I informed the dive supervisor of my dilemma over the communicator. His instructions were unclear due to the fact that he, along with five other divers, were all laughing hysterically. Needless to say I aborted the dive.

I was instructed to make three agonizing in-water decompression stops totaling thirty-five minutes before I could reach the surface to begin my chamber dry decompression. When I arrived at the surface, I was wearing nothing but my brass helmet.

As I climbed out of the water, the medic, with tears of laughter running down his face, handed me a tube of cream and told me to rub it on my butt as soon as I got in the chamber. The cream put the fire out, but I couldn’t poop for two days because my butt was swollen shut.

So, next time you’re having a bad day at work, think about how much worse it would be if you had a jellyfish shoved up your butt.

Now repeat to yourself, ‘I love my job, I love my job, I love my job.’ Now whenever you have a bad day, ask yourself, is this a jellyfish bad day? May you NEVER have a jellyfish bad day!!!!!

NOW ALL YOU GOOD PEOPLE OUT THERE REPEAT AFTER ME

I LOVE MY JOB


I LOVE MY JOB


I LOVE MY JOB

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19 thoughts on “My New Mantra "I Love My Job"

  1. Sorry for shameless begging for votes but i m lagging behind by just 4 votes! Please Vote for Me at IndiBlogger Thanks!

    Congrats Reema for winning πŸ˜€

  2. I totally love my job even when I have to afce the judge’s wrath. Nothign compared to having a jellyfish up my butt πŸ˜›

    Yeah!!! πŸ˜€

  3. I love my job! I love my job! I love my job!
    In the last agency I worked in, we handled Monster.com. Thinking of an idea for them, I googled worst jobs. And guess what was on top of the list?
    Deodorant Tester! The person would have to sniff armpits all day long!!

    Ewww! I like my job. I can even, if I try, like Mogambo my boss

  4. Probability of a jelly fish biting my butt…hmmm..not so high I would think…say 1%

    Probability of cursing every single morning while getting to work, enduring never-been-f#$@ed bosses, counting time to rush back home…100%

    I still hate my job. I thoroughly enjoyed the post though πŸ™‚

    You just might get a jelly fished butt for that!

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