Sex and Spirituality

Celibacy seems to the fundamental requirement of anyone aspiring to be a Godman or a GodMata. This is such an impossible requirement – perhaps its been put there so that the person who attains it actually becomes a saint?

With the recent scandals being widely reported in the newspaper, I once again started reading up on the subject. I read up a lot about it in my teens and tweens. I once, in my teens actually walked into an ashram and disturbed two holy ladies of a rather strict spiritual sect indulging in lesbian sex. Dont ask!!! And no – it did not scar me for life. I thought that they were human too and found this entirely natural. We are sexual beings and I do not think that God would damn us for indulging in sex. If he/she hated it so much, we would not have been sexual beings any way. Two young women (barely 20 or so) , on the spiritual path with no male company (forbidden) sought some solace with each other … it did not diminish them in my eye. I found it sad and poignant.

“Continence, My child, is the sacrifice asked by the Father. You cannot divide yourselves; there must be a full dedication to the will of God.” – Our Lady, March 24, 1974

Oh really? I have always thought otherwise. If you trap or control anything natural – it lashes out and breaks through with redoubled ferocity. In this case … sexual forces, which when naturally released, bring forth life, de-stress us and bring us closer to the loved one … becomes perverted. It is much like water which stays fresh and healthy only when it flows. If it is in a stagnant pool, it rots and the stink is intolerable to bear.

This is what child abusers in the garb of priesthood have shown us. This is what we learn from Nithyanand Swami’s infamous and sleazy agreement

“Volunteer understands that these activities (tantra sex) could be physically and mentally challenging, and may involve nudity, access to visual images, graphic visual depictions, and descriptions of nudity and sexual activity, close physical proximity and intimacy, verbal and written descriptions and audio sounds of a sexually oriented, and erotic nature, etc.

… and it was mandatory for his devotees to sign this. And many of them must have signed it too. This is not sex in its natural form – it is perversion.

Animals are a guide here. Animals do not watch or read porn. They do not go rape little animals – and will not do stuff like torture other animals for sexual pleasure. In fact they would not hunt or have sex for sport. When the time is right – they do it and get on with life.

I have also come upon stupid misconceptions like “Seminal Loss takes away energy from the body”. This was told to me by a very educated person with all seriousness. Wrong thing to say to me. I am prepared to argue about it – and have read a whole lot of research material that disproves it. Needless to say – the gentleman and me are not on talking terms anymore. I really shattered his illusions. For his sake I hope he grew up somewhat ….

After the death of my brother, I took to meditation. In fact meditation is one thing that kept me going when everything in my life turned topsy turvy. I found that going deep into meditation made you really get intense sexual dreams. This is the bald truth. In fact for most people on the path to spirituality have discovered it. Do click the link and read before sending me hate mails and trolling my blog please.

These days we are bombarded with titillating sexual images and messages – the TV, ads, songs … and the audio visual stimuli can overload the senses of anyone – more so the person who is trying to overcome it.

I really think that celibacy, like other misconceptions like “The Earth is flat or we would have fallen off” and “The Sun rotates round the Earth” etc etc should be thrown into the dustbin.


48 thoughts on “Sex and Spirituality

  1. well well… I couldnt agree more…

    a lot of people will deny and pretend as if they are saints… fools… !!!

    its natural and its there… so why stop or deny it..

  2. 100% true, Ritu. In fact, anything – religion or related practices/ cults/ herd mentality following – that stops you from expressing yourself the way God intended it will only be leading up to something hideous as a vent. Repressed sexuality is one of those. And God knows we don’t need any more of it than is already inflicted by conservative treatment of the ‘S’ word in our country anyway!

  3. very well written….

    completely agree, its natural and should be treated naturally.

    However would have to negate a tiny flaw in your argument – the animal kingdom too has its rapes and intimidation. Especially in the monkey family.

    • We are animal lovers Pinku – have kept dogs, cats, fishes, turtles … and even parrots during the course of time. I have yet to observe sustained cruelty and perversion in animals. Ahh monkeys you said? First cousins of ours they are …

  4. Sex is the best theraphy a person can get, i always tell, but people don’t listen to mee….shesh…:D

    ooh and no…having sex is the best spiritual worship you can get and pagan, greek, Egypt and Hinduism does promote sex…:)

    • Sid if you are approaching them in that manner – I am not surprised!!! They must be running away from you then hehehehhe. Hatha Yogis say that sex takes away from worship! So do many others …

  5. I agree with you. It is a kind of emotion which needs to expressed at the right time and right manner. Discarding doesnt make you Godman/Godmaa or it doesnt take you close to God either.

  6. I agree that suppressing strong emotions is not Ok. Well said, Ritu, that animals have sex only when the need arises and not out of perversion. Our dear God-man Nityananda seems to be a complete creep and a pervert. I happened to see part of the video that was shown on Television, and it was disgusting, this guy is certainly a creep, and I wish people like him are hanged before Kasab! Atleast the latter had a goal in life, and risked all to achieve it.

  7. Wow… I never knew so many things…
    Like I didn’t know deep meditation and spirutiality leads to sexual fantasies… very interesting read.
    I do agree with what you say of course…
    Virginity, Celibacy – both are overrated concepts and both can be thrown into the dustbin as you say!!

  8. Now that is a BOLD post, but I truly agree. Sex is a normal process, a need to be satisfied like food, clothes and shelter, the more we try to bury it the more agressive it gets to find an outlet…

    • I dont know about the boldness … it certainly had to be said – what with all the hypocrisy and suppression – which is making this entire thing so perverse – and also giving it undue importance …

  9. Human beings as they have evolved have come to be wary of anything that makes them remotely happy. So, sex is to be hushed up. The day we learn to embrace happiness as a part of life, we will sweep this crap under the carpet as well.

    Nicely written Ritu. Will read the link later. Read the first two paras and was interested. I’ve always wanted to go for a vipasana course.

  10. The problem is that these god men are suppose to give up the material world in search for seeking a higher level of spirituality and that is what actually attracts people to them who think they hold the answers for their problems.

    I don’t think its a question of celibacy but of people’s perception that god men don’t indulge in material stuff/vasana and that’s what most people find it hard to accept when the skeleton tumbles out of the closet.

    Not everyone can become a Buddha and we need to realize that.

  11. Points I agree:

    1. If you trap or control anything natural – it lashes out and breaks through with redoubled ferocity… (but not entirely though! I too have read a lot of text and come to conclusion that though celibacy is near to impossible to practice but this can’t be made as a rule)

    2. I found that going deep into meditation made you really get intense sexual dreams. This is the bald truth. (100% true…it’s nature’s way to drain out the sexual desires in your mind and once you cross that hurdle it eases your mind…swan’s song!)

    On the whole, this post justifies with what it says…and FYI there does exist “tantric sex” but it’s now an extinct and forbidden knowledge…as it is has a sharp “thin line of margin for error”

    No, I’m not superstitious 😉

    • Ashish I feel that if a person is frigid or has low sexual urges it would be easier for that person to remain celibate, but for normal people, its an impossible goal.

      Yes, the cleansing thing happens and it is rather disturbing when it does – more so since you want to and are aiming to reach for the spiritual.

      I have read about tantric sex – impossible to have missed reading it in this day and age! But well!!!! It would require a lot of maturity and commitment and not a sleazy legal agreement.

      Thanks for commenting

  12. Sex is one of the basic needs just like the craving for food. You surpress that feeling and one day it is bound to overtake your sense. But then some people are born disinterested to that feeling that it is easy for them or natural for them to maintain celibacy. For rest, forcefully maintainint it is like sitting over a volcano. Some may have a better mental strength to control it but for rest it is just when it will overcome them…

  13. Hi Ritu,

    Celibacy itself is a stupidity.The sex urge is natural and We all worth doing many good things to this world,rather than taking all our energy to practice a stupid concept.Its like whether you like mango or not. If u like it,eat well,eat till u r sated with its flavour.If you don’t like it,just leave it and try some pineapples;),rather than taking the entire energy to proove that mango eaters are devils;)

    Marketing the pseudo celibacy is the cheapest thing one can ever do.And for those who are practising it for a sainthood,’ please go to some Himalayas and do it there without seeking the limelight since it may help u too.’

  14. Recently a prof committed suicide because his sexual preference was recorded in camera by someone for whatever reason. What a shame!
    Sexual urges are natural, the degree varies based on many factors like upbringing, peer group, genetics ( yes!), etc, etc….
    These days it has become a habit to blow up the stories of sexual nature ( sadhus, ministers, teachers….etc etc ) as if they have sinned in doing it. They might be blamed of being hypocritical but then that’s how the world at large is. I think most people would like to keep their sexual life and preferences under the wraps.
    How many of us even discuss sex openly, leave alone practice it?
    Please do not take me wrongly, but I doubt if the people participating in discussion here would be comfortable doing it the same {open /frank ) manner if it were in the real.
    My take on this is …its a strictly personal choice; we should not comment or look down upon ANYTHING. If a so called godman is doing it despite preaching otherwise, so be it. His life !

    • CP, sex is a private thing. We are not dogs or other members of the animal kingdom who would do it in public. Of course it would make us uncomfortable. Its a human condition. Celibacy on the other hand is not a human condition. I feel if such repression is not there … we would be able to live (hopefully) without child abuse and such like perversions

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