I started writing this post when I was completely lethally bored. My kids are out of town …. the @#$&% did not ring me up even once to inform me that they had reached safely Humph! My boss aka Mogambo is so busy, he has completely forgotten the existence of one lonely number cruncher in the corner cabin (Man! I sound as though I actually miss being given work – I really need to get myself a life!!!)
Out of sheer desperation and boredom I googled BORED and I got a list of questions – insane ones on this site. Thank you internet, if it wasnt for you I would have remarried and knowing my totally suicidal taste for unsuitable but charming rogues, I would have been miserable.
Am spending the rest of the afternoon trying to answer the questions – and what do you know, being paid for it 😀
My answers are in italics. If you are bored and wondering what to do – you can try attempt them.
Are children who act in rated ‘R’ movies allowed to see them?
Ummm, I dont think so ….
Can you make a candle out of your earwax?
Ewwwwww
When French people swear do they say pardon my English?
Hahaha, The French would commit suicide first!
Aren’t the ‘good things that come to those who wait’ just the leftovers from the people that got there first?
I dont know – I never wait, simply go for the kill
If the swat team breaks down your door do they have to replace it later?
No shit – cracked termite infested door – any body? Lets make a crank call and get it replaced
Can it be cloudy and foggy at the same time?
I dont think so – what do you say?
“Cute as a button” Is that supposed to be a compliment? Since when are buttons cute?
You know those baby blue butterfly shaped ones … or pink glittery ones??? Ahh I give up!
Can you breathe out of your nose and mouth at the same time?
What are you trying to do, make me faint?
Are marbles made of marble?
Nah! Glass ( I think)
Why does the last piece of ice always stick to the bottom of the cup?
I dont know – some obscure rule of Physics I guess
If you pay for a vacation and your plane crashes on the way there, do you get you money back? (Granted you lived)
In the interest of fairness, one should!
Why did Yankee Doodle name the feather in his hat Macaroni?
Ummm, pass
Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, “I think I’ll squeeze these dangly things here and drink what comes out”?
Not me dammit, that was one hell of a kinky person!
Who was the first person to say, “See that chicken over there … I’m gonna eat the first thing that comes out if its butt”?
See the answer above
Isn’t Disney World just a people trap operated by a mouse?
I agree
If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
The dharmik mafia will kill me if I answer that
Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet soup?
You tell me!!
Can you get cornered in a round room?
I guess one gets rounded in a round room – shit I’m getting confused here
Why do we wash behind our ears? Who really looks there?
Mommy
Why don’t the hairs on your arms get split ends?
Oh wow! Kitne velley hain hum
In that song, she’ll be coming around the mountain, who is she?
Take your pick – Cameron Diaz, Penelope Cruize, Katrina Kaif …….
Wouldn’t it be smart to make the sticky stuff on envelopes taste like chocolate?
We would eat the envelopes and never post them!
Why is Joey short for Joe, when Joey has more letters?
Hahahaha
Why is it when we talk to God we are praying, but when God talks to us we are put into the loony bin?
This one is profound
Since bread is square, then why is sandwich meat round?
You know something, this has always bugged me!
Why does a round pizza come in a square box?
Yeah!!!
Why is it that when things get wet they get darker, even though water is clear??
This is one question I never thought of asking!
Isn’t it funny how the word ‘politics’ is made up of the words ‘poli’ meaning ‘many’ in Latin, and ‘tics’ as in ‘bloodsucking creatures’?
Yes Indeed
There are so many more over there – but I am not bored any more – so back to work for me!
Ciao 😀
Weaving a Web 
lol…
funny questions… and ultimately true that they are created by someone who has so much of VAILAA time… 😀
Yeah Vaila and bored
heh – good one…and what’s more, some of them actually have answers…
– Can it be cloudy and foggy at the same time?
Ans: yes…why not? We had that condition this morning here.
– Why does a round pizza come in a square box?
Ans: cost – the cost of making a round box is higher than making a square/rectangle.
-Why did Yankee Doodle name the feather in his hat Macaroni?
Ans: Back in Pre-Revolutionary America when the song “Yankee Doodle” was first popular, the singer was not referring to the pasta “macaroni” in the line that reads “stuck a feather in his hat and called it macaroni”. “Macaroni” was a fancy (“dandy”) style of Italian dress widely imitated in England at the time. By sticking a feather in his cap and calling himself a “dandy,” Yankee Doodle was proudly proclaiming himself to be a gentleman of some social standing. (not my info – see this link: http://kids.niehs.nih.gov/lyrics/yankee.htm)
M (in holiday mood)
M (in holiday mood) …. thanks. How did I forget the Macaronis? Me being such a big fan of Georgette Heyer should have remembered
I’m burning the midnight oil and OMG! Brilliant! Unfortunately my boss sits very close or I’d seriously attempt this next time I’m bored! I resort to making weird lists in my notebook…
If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
Well yeah it does… they never give logic to the morals anyway!
Can you breathe out of your nose and mouth at the same time?
I tried it…Yes you can, if you concentrate! 🙂
Why don’t the hairs on your arms get split ends?
Cause we condition it with cold cream! (Yikes…it’s worse than the question!)
Hahahaha Advitiya 😛
Poor duck in no more poor now ,she’s safe BUT remember only till I keep getting my regular dose of comments .Yeh dil maange more comments .Thanks a lot for leaving a short and lively comment .
Read BORED with lots of interest.You have magic in your words .Enjoyed it thoroughly .
Nandita with the cute duck – thanks for dropping by. We will ensure that the duck lives 😛
Whoa, thats an interesting set of question and even more inteesting answers. I liked the ‘morality from morons’ bit! Absolutely true, that one!!! And oh yeah I ask too, why the loony bin when God talks to us??? 😛 Hahahaha!!
I know – so unfair!
why do i think that i have read this post on ur blog before? is it deja vu or something else
Its something else – uploaded it once – but decided it need editing, so pulled it back
Hahaha,
this one was senselessly great.
LOL Mampi
Lol! I always knew Google would come to our aid no matter what!
Good ole Googleji, wonder what we did when he wasn’t around
Great jokes. And now just like you, I am not bored any more.
bravo!
Go to the website I linked whenever you are – there are many more over there
LOL 🙂 The square and the round of it is, this made for an easy time pass!
Ha ha! Had loads of fun! Great answers there. I should try it too when I find time 😀
Why do we wash behind our ears? Who really looks there?
My dogs always do 😀
Those are hilarious questions and answers! Glad you got that break. It’s good to offer yourself a fun, useless break in work as a reward for finishing a task that otherwise would bore you. It helps to say, If I just finish this stack or this problem, I will have earned 5 minutes on http://www.whatever. Next time, see me at ThePowerOfBoredom.com Not as funny, but also thought provoking, I hope.
Letitia
I will Letitia, I will